A Call from the Past

I write romance novels.  I’m unpublished but I adore love stories.  Now my life has the drama of the genre of fiction that I’m passionate about.  I really shouldn’t complain; I know a number of women that could gladly switch places with me in a heartbeat but I’m the type of woman that prefers these kind of plot twists to remain within the covers of a romance novel.

First let me say that I love my guy in so many ways but… are things perfect?  No.  And he would be the first to say there are things he can’t give me at this time in our relationship.  It’s frustrating to think about the limitations but we are trying to make the best of it.  Some people say love has a way of conquering all but has that theory has ever been tested?

Anyway, yesterday night I had a conversation with an ex that I once loved very deeply.  The relationship ended badly seven years ago due to choices he made.  He has been searching for me for the past month and Facebook finally brought him back into my life.  The quandary?  He wants me back and part of me has been awaiting this moment.  (Sigh)

At one time, he was everything I thought I wanted in a husband and father to my children.  I remember the countless number of nights I asked God how my ex could sabotage a loving relationship but I soon realized that the timing of our was off. 

There was no way I could hold something together that wasn’t a priority for the man I loved.

So I walked away… to heal my wounds, sever the soul tie and learn the meaning of the relationship.  The days, weeks and months after that weren’t easy.  I was close to his family, especially his brother and sister-in-law; and I struggled to understand how the breakup came to fruition.

Now seven years later, the tall, handsome man from my past returns to my life with just a keystroke and after one phone conversation I’m feeling unresolved emotions I’ve buried for years. 

I’ll tell my guy what has transpired; praying that my ability to be transparent about the situation will help him process my circumstances.  I’m not sure what will happen and I had a very sleepless night last night.