Love, Infatuations, Timing, and Fate

Before internet-assisted social media connections and online dating, people met and fell in love the old fashioned way… in person.  Sometimes family members would intervened with their dating recommendation or family member would try to play matchmaker but for the most part you knew you had to get out of your comfort zone and make yourself meet people that shared some of your interests. It’s the only way fate could orchestrate a chance meeting with someone special. 

Yesterday, on the way home from work, I stopped at my favorite mega bookstore and had the pleasure of being asked to take a survey by a group of college students.  Seeing that most people were in a hurry to take their purchases home and get out of the summer heat, I stopped and decided to see what kind of data they were gathering. They were asking questions about love and dating in today’s world.

Once the group realized I was a romance author, they began picking my brain like I was some kind of romance savant.  I reassured them that I was just a normal woman that had my ups and down with love like anyone else but that didn’t deter them from getting my views on life and love.

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We talked about romance, long-distance relationships, gay marriage and even unrequited love.  I must say the last topic threw me a little. Especially when an overly confident young man stated people with secret love infatuations are abnormal. I had to stop the fallacy before he made a lasting imprint on his companions’ brains.

I reminded this small group that it’s nerve racking to experience a strong attraction towards a person you just met.  And many people like to take their time before they unveil their true feelings. I had to take it easy on the young people because for their generation unrequited love involves stalking someone on Facebook and Twitter, confronting someone’s former companion in public and leaving several disturbing voicemail messages that could be considered harassment.

Such a totally different world from Generation Xers.

Then one of the young ladies asked me, can unrequited love become reciprocated love? I told her, "Yes, but it takes honesty, emotional nakedness, and God’s grace for the object of your affection to be open enough to feel the same way. The whole course of love is not really in your hands."

In my own life, I met someone and the moment our eyes locked my heart leaped.  It was exhilarating and unnerving at the same time because his gaze unnerved me. Love at first sight?  Maybe, maybe not… but I’ll never deny the feeling I felt; it was the kind of knowing only felt in the spirit.

One of the girls asked me if I’ll ever reveal my feelings and I answered, “Sure if our paths cross again.”

Then another of the student asked, “Why don’t you just Facebook him and ask him to call you?”

It seemed logical and simple enough until Carly Rae Jepsen’s summer hit, ‘Call Me Maybe’ came into my mind. I shook my head. Not my style.  “We’ll connect. That’s one thing romance writers believe in –- overcoming the odds.”

“That sounds impossible.”

“I don’t believe that. Improbability isn’t in my spiritual DNA.” I gathered my purchases, thanked them for the nice chat, and exited the bookstore.

When I got into my car, part of me wondered if I sounded like some fairytale-filled Pollyanna. Then I thought about many couples I’ve met over the years and their wonderful love stories. Love happens when it’s meant to occur, when both parties are open and ready.  That’s the beauty of real love and romance… the possibilities are endless.  :)

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