I check the mailbox and receive a first class mail letter from my mother. It’s a rare act in the world of email and phone calls so I knew it had to be a serious matter.

My mother and her siblings come from a strong God-centered, family-oriented household. My grandparents always placed the responsibility of guiding children squarely upon parents. And directed their children to teach their offspring to love and serve one another, keep the commandments of God, honor their parents, and to be contributing citizens of the world.

The hard part for all parents is to guide children without being too coercive or controlling but somehow my grandparents always encouraged desirable behavior with positive reinforcement, with clear and firm rules and expectations, and they enforced the consequences of breaking them. Their gentle-but-firm guidance was crucial because it was passed down through the generations and has help my own children develop an internal sense of self-responsibility and morality.

So I sat down with this letter from my mother and tore the envelope open.  It’s a one page, typed document and the language and signature at the bottom defiantly belonged to her. She decided to send me and my brother a birthday letter each year to impart some of her wisdom and her concerns.  (NOTE: My brother Wayne and I have birthdays in February.)  Her words gave me a strong confirmation that my desire to launch my New Adult series, Jacmuir and to follow God’s example in all things would be pleasing to God and my family. (See her letter below). 

I hadn’t spoken to my mother about my resolution to surrender to the will of Christ in all things because I wasn’t sure how to explain some of my relationship mistakes.  See my ex-boyfriends and ex-fiancé were handsome, decent men, by the world’s standards, but I knew my family wouldn’t approve of their lack of integrity and some of their disrespectful actions. I worried about explaining why I gave so much of myself to people, organizations, and things that didn’t support my spiritual walk. I knew the tears would come and then I would hear her disappointment so I made up my mind I would tell her when I return home later in the year. (She lives in Florida and I live in New Jersey.)

As God would have it, my mother had the strong feeling to write me a letter before I returned home. It was like she was writing her side of the conversation we hadn’t even had. 

I know she’s concerned about the status of her health and the number of days she has left on this earth so I’m very appreciative of her love and her guidance. Standing firm on my beliefs has given me so much clarity now. I have a great support system with my family and friends. #TeamWorthTheWait  I don’t know how my choices will affect my writing style but I’m looking forward to seeing what unfolds in the months and years to come.

Please forgive me for not blogging for a while; I needed to reevaluate my understandings about life, God, relationships, and review my imprint as an author.

ON THE NOVEL FRONT: Starting a New Adult inspirational series in the midst of a sexually charged New Adult genre is precarious but I know Jacmuir will be a significant contribution.

Every book series can’t be written in the same format because the genre needs diverse viewpoints highlighted to grow. Besides, my purpose as a writer is to write the New Adult series that’s speaks to my readers, not to follow the current trends and chase money. If only a handful of young people embrace it and learn something valuable about friendship and trust, then I’ll already be very blessed.

God is the center of my life so I’m working with him to make this story a reality has been tremendously satisfying. So I’m working hard to present Jacmuir (Book One) in 2014.

As for Book Three of the Sheridan Series, it will be completed before the end of Spring 2014.  Latrell’s story has been the most research and emotionally charged of the series. I had no idea it would make my emotions so raw that I would have to take many breaks from writing it but it’s an in-depth look at Latrell’s inner demons and his quest for acceptance.

It’s amazing how cathartic the writing process can be for me. I can leave all of my family’s pain and struggle within the pages of a novel and leave unburdened. Anyone that writes in a journal should know exactly what I mean. How does the saying go, “Let go, let God.”  Yeah, that’s what Wild West is doing for me. :)  I’m trying very hard to make my grandparents proud.

ON THE PERSONAL FRONT: Well I’ve had a few curve-balls thrown at me so I’ve decided to hand over the reins of my life to God. I’ve decided to stay prayed up, keep positive people around me, and follow Christ example in ALL areas of my life, not just the areas I’ve mastered over the years. 

Now, I’ve always been a Christian woman but when it came to my relationships I wanted to handle that on my own terms.  See, I knew what I wanted, what I had to offer, and I am a romance author so why couldn’t I just ‘handle it’?

Well, that’s because my choices were bring me more heartache than joy.

I declined a marriage proposal last week and asked God to take over the affairs of my heart. It wasn’t easy to refuse but a Christ-centered home is a high priority for me and my daughters. Just believing there's a God isn’t enough to lead a family; your actions must be aligned with Christian values too. So now I’m letting God handle my love life with the full support and encouragement of my family.  That’s right – from now on ‘I Am Second’.

Some people say God is the ultimate matchmaker, while others say I’ll be a celibate and bitter old woman if I wait on Him. I really don’t know what the outcome will be but … that’s part of the beauty of this. I don’t have to ‘know’. I choose to wait ON HIM. I can work my job, write my novels, raise my daughters, worship my God, and enjoy my life and let God do whatever His going to do.  #TeamWorthTheWait

That’s the quick update on me. My regular blog posts will resume next week.  Enjoy the words of my spiritual sister, poet Janette...ikz, in the youTube video below.

Have a great week.